Coolio: Someone Forgot To Pack the Tang

Coolio
Jazzbones, Tacoma, Wa
06.07.14

Jazzbones in Tacoma had three openers for Coolio Saturday night, as well as Goast, who was set to co-perform with the headlining man. Unfortunately, it was time to go on another kind of trip, because we couldn’t have the hop if we didn’t have the hip. If you have more patience than I, read on and find out if Coolio owns a calendar or a watch.

Dr. Von, a Seattle-based rapper, opened the show with approximately ten songs. Playing to a growing crowd, the venue offered an intimate opportunity for area fans to get up close and personal. Dr. Von wasted no time priming the airwaves with hip-hop style and wall-thumping beats. While not much information is available on this gentleman, he certainly picked a good night to show off his talents. Unbeknownst to the majority, there would be plenty of time to mingle. The early crowd hovered around the 40-somethings, expecting to recapture a youthful, summertime sentiment long gone by. I contemplated bringing my original cassette of the Dangerous Minds soundtrack that I had tortured my mother with as a kid, hoping, like the rest of us, to feel a little piece of me come around full circle. Maybe next time.

XP, also known as Xperience, took the second slot of the evening. Having watched this young man perform for T. Mills back in February, our photographer and I agreed that he has certainly stepped up his game and improved his stage presence. He played approximately ten songs as well, including a rad sampling of The Bravery. He also played his staple, Your Favorite Song, to which I caught myself humming along. I imagine when we see him for the third time, I’ll have most of it down. Before his last piece, Xperience played a badass cover of Black Hole Sun. The genre-jump spurred quizzical eyes from onlookers, but I thought it was a confident move, and a cool nod to Seattle. I sang along in terrible fashion.

The Staxx Brothers played an upbeat, interesting set. They had plenty of energy and humor – two things that were about to become a hot commodity over the next 3 hours. Presenting themselves as “the bad boys of rock ‘n roll,” the Staxx Brothers also included two ladies dedicated to backing vocals, making them six in total. As much as I enjoyed the twerking, I probably would’ve taken a pass on the intermittent ‘no shirt’ policy. This group has been crafting their unique Seattle sound for about seven years now. You can listen to them on bandcamp or visit their website at Staxxbrothers.com.

Now comes the point in the evening where the kids begin to flood in. By kids, I mean it’s a 21 and up show. This is also the point in the evening where, very shortly, we expect to see Coolio. Goast took the stage with astronaut helmets at the ready, although their prep time for this flight may have been a little shortsighted. It seems they didn’t anticipate having to carry the entire show on their shoulders, and after about five songs into their set, the timing of their vocals and the opening of their mouths didn’t quite match. Read into that what you will. For the next two hours, Goast continued their set, and let’s just say that the only thing flowing in Jazzbones were the drinks. Amid the weak stage chatter and awkward pauses between songs, the crowd took to booing as the clock passed midnight. Coolio quietly (finally) took the stage at 12:45, after most of the folks who had patiently sat and waited for him had already left in agitation and fatigue. Coolio also seemed a bit tuckered out, but found enough energy to keep the kids entertained until curfew.